Ok, so I have this friend... who I should mention, but I won't because I'm too nice. Hefin, you know exactly who she is.
Two years ago, she went off to university, promising that she would come back and visit any chance she got. I was fine with that. It didn't bother me.
The first time I knew she and I were drifting further and further apart was when, while talking to me online, she got up, without saying anything to me about leaving, with a simple brb. Now, we all now that brb means Be Right Back. She's a fucking liar. She got up, walked off and went to hang out with some of her fucking university friends. Luckily, I got tired of waiting for her to come back and went to bed. I later found out that she was there until 2 am... she said she'd brb at 11. Proof of how much I mean to her.
This started happening regularly and whenever she said brb, I didn't expect her back for hours on end and most of the time I was right. So I started giving up. If she couldn't make the time to talk to me, her best friend, then why the fuck should I waste time to talk to her?
Well, I'm a wimp, and for some stupid ass reason that I don't know, I would keep going online to talk to her, although I was getting colder to her. She would tell me something about university life and I would be all 'ya, that's nice'. Cuz really, I couldn't give a shit about what happens, I still can't.
Now, a year later, she's living with 3 of her friends. I was fine with that too. And I supported her in getting a house and all that shit. I don't see why I should've, but I guess I'm just a friend who cares too much. When she got this house, I figured, that's it... I'll never see her again. I was right. I don't think I've seen her since before last summer before she got the house. And I don't expect that to change at all.
Now, she's using the excuse that she has to work, so she can't come back to the middle of nowhere where I live and visit. Then, she pops up and tells me, "Oh I might be going camping!" I'm all, woo, sounds fun. Ya, and in my head I'm like... you can go camping, but you can't take two days to come see me? Anyway. Then she's all, "ya, I hope so-and-so doesn't come" (one of her university friends) and that is just what pissed me off... she can go camping with those fucking assholes, but when it comes to coming here and visiting me, her work schedule is too full that she can't take time off? What the fuck?!
Maybe I'm asking too much... Maybe I should just stop caring altogether... And she flips out at me when she mentions seeing each other and I'm all "ya? why bother?"
I know this may not matter to anyone else, but it matters to me... and I hate being the caring person I am... I wish I could be cold and heartless like a lot of my characters, but I'm not like that and things like this bug the hell outta me... *sigh* I give up... I don't know why I bother anymore...
So you'll probably end up hearing a lot about this one... just about everything she does pisses me off somehow...
Fri Mar 13, 2009 1:41 am
